http://www.gallup.com/poll/151490/Fear-Big-Government-Near-Record-Level.aspx

In Singapore, when you run a random marathon, they give you a tote bag to commemorate the event and so you can stop global warming.

In Korea, they give you a hat, gloves, and a face mask because they have no global warming.

http://usa.chinadaily.com.cn/china/2011-12/06/content_14220670.htm

I’m confused, is it ‘fog’ or not ‘fog’.  I just know that it hurt to breathe the ‘air’.

Happy 9th birthday to the big little Stockdale!

Nothing is as fun ( or as cold ) as taking 12 little girls ice skating.

Nothing much happening in Seoul.  We’re just trying to stay warm.  Winter stinks!

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone who actually gets to celebrate this great holiday on a Thursday.  Our Turkey Day is delayed until Saturday.  Watch some football, drink some beer and wine, and eat some bird.  Have fun!

http://m.yahoo.com/w/news_america/beijing-air-pollution-hazardous-us-embassy-052930645.html?orig_host_hdr=news.yahoo.com&.intl=us&.lang=en-us

Just maybe, I could have been mistaken.  Just maybe, but I highly doubt it.  The sign said it was HEAVY FOG.

Last week, the Stockdales went to China to see the sights.  While we were there, we discovered that many of the myths/propaganda that are perpetuated about China are untrue.

Myth # 1 – The air and environment in Beijing is dirty and polluted.  FALSE, none of the pictures of the Stockdales at The Forbidden City have any kind of haze in them, especially since they were taken in the late morning, not at sunset.

Myth # 2 – People in China are poor.  FALSE, this lady is so wealthy she is talking on her cell phone while playing on her iPad and she has a bee costume for her dog and her dog has orange ears.

Myth # 3 – They won’t let random people in China control the traffic signals.  FALSE, they leave the cabinets open so Mrs. Stockdale can manipulate the lights at will.

Myth # 4 – The acrobats in China cannot support their entire bodyweight with their mouths while their feet are contorted over their backs while twirling things that resemble pizzas.  FALSE, see the undisputable photographic evidence.

Myth # 5 – The Chinese never want their pictures taken with American children.  FALSE, again see the undisputable photographic evidence.

Myth # 6 – The Great Wall is small, dull, and boring and no one from Leawood, KS ever goes there.  FALSE, The Great Wall of China is actually pretty darn cool, especially when another tourist points at the big little Stockdale’s sweatshirt and asks if she goes to Barstow in Kansas City because they live in Leawood.

Myth # 7 – Xi’an (the city with the Terra Cotta warriors) is polluted and looks like a toxic waste dump, it doesn’t have a Subway, and this is just some random guy signing the book, not the actual farmer who discovered all this back in the 70s who received $10 for his efforts.  FALSE – see indisputable photographic evidence.

Myth # 8 – Fog cannot delay your flight back to Seoul for three hours and make your children almost miss Halloween and thereby scar them for life.  FALSE – see the indisputable photographic evidence.  The screen says there is HEAVY FOG at noon in a city that is about hundred miles from the ocean or a significant source of moisture.  In no way should you construe that this is air pollution that is preventing you from making out the ginormous Airbus A380 behind our plane on the tarmac.  Remember, the sign says it is HEAVY FOG.

Remember, you should never ever believe all those nasty rumors you hear about China.  The Stockdales have been there, they should know!

I’m pretty sure this says I owe someone 32,490 KRW (that’s $32 in metric).  However, I have no clue how to pay them and I don’t know if this is for water, gas, electricity, garbage collection or the feeding, care, bathing, and training of my unicorn.

( click to embiggen )

I think the graph represents the number of rainbows my unicorn eats each day.

In the United States if you buy a used car with a three-inch high stack of $10 and $50 dollar bills, you’re a drug dealer.  In Korea, if you buy a used car with a three-inch high stack of 10,000 and 50,000 KRW notes, you’re just another guy buying a used car.

Meet the 2004 Kia Carens Etrex Edition.  The little Stockdales and I call her Caren.  She may not be much, but she’s got a third row of seats and she’s a diesel.

The folks at TopGear.com had an extremely accurate opinion of the Kia Carens. 

They also said the name was ‘stupid’ in another part of the review.

After not driving for almost two years, it was fairly easy to pick back up.  That said, there really aren’t any ‘rules’ to driving in Korea.  There are some ‘suggestions’, but I would always refer to them as ‘voluntary’ or ‘optional’ not ‘mandatory’ or ‘enforced.’

If you want to run the red light, run the red light.  If you want to double park, double park.  If you want to drive across the sidewalk instead of waiting for the light to turn green, go ahead.  The main point, is don’t hit anything.  As long as you don’t hit another car, a person, or a guy on a scooter overloaded with sheet metal, no one cares what you do.

The only part of driving the Koreans do take very seriously is the process of getting your driver’s license. 

First, you have to go to the US Embassy and have your Kansas driver’s license notarized.  This is basically a note from your mother that says your driver’s license is actually a driver’s license.  When you get there, you take a number that I unfortunately discarded and wait about 10 minutes.

Second, go to the second floor of the Korean DMV and get a number that I unfortunately discarded.  Don’t forget to bring your Kansas driver’s license, your Korean Alien Registration Card, your passport, and three color photographs.  Thankfully, they have a special line for foreigners where the nice lady speaks ‘English’.  Now wait 10 minutes for the nice lady behind the counter to tell you the note from your mother is wrong.

Third, return to the US Embassy a week later for another note from your mother.  This time, wait 10 minutes and keep the number for your stupid website.

Fourth, return to the second floor of the Korean DMV and take a number.  Wait 15 minutes.  See the same nice lady who rejected the previous note from your mother and breathe a sign of relief when she begins handing you random forms written in Korean.

Fifth, take the random forms to the ‘arts and crafts’ table where you cut your three color photographs to the correct size, glue them to the appropriate spots on the form and guess at where you are supposed to sign it.

Sixth, go downstairs to the ‘revenue counter’ and buy a 6,000 KRW (that’s $6 USD in metric) stamp and affix it to the appropriate place on the form.

Seventh, take another number to see the nice lady.  Wait 15 minutes.  She will look at your form, tape over the three color photographs where you carefully glued them down and tell you to go run down and buy another stamp from the ‘revenue counter’ because you needed two and then to go to basement and give someone 4,000 KRW (that’s $4 USD in metric).  She will also take your Kansas driver’s license and keep it for you in a safe place.  If you go back to Kansas, you need to revisit the nice lady to get it back or just tell the Kansas DMV you lost it and they will give you a new one if you have your birth certificate, proof of address, and a note from your mother.

Eighth, go to the basement and stand behind all the other people waiting to give money to someone at a desk.  After you give your money to the lady, blindly follow all the other people into a room where you stand in line for 10 minutes waiting for a ‘doctor’ in a white coat to ask you to read an eye chart.  If you are Korean you also need to take a hearing test and squat to prove you are physically fit.  If you are American they know we are fat and don’t listen, so they let us skip this part.

Ninth, return to the second floor and get another number to see the nice lady.  Only wait five minutes for her to tell you need to get in the Korean only line to take the most pointless written driver’s examination ever administered.  Lose the number and another pointless gag for your website.

Tenth, get a number and wait almost an hour for another nice lady to stamp a box on your form so you can go to the fourth floor and take the most pointless written driver’s examination ever administered.

Eleventh, don’t bother studying Korean traffic law, go to the fourth floor and take the most pointless written driver’s examination ever administered.  Surprisingly, you don’t have to wait.

Twelfth, take another number and wait 5 minutes to show the nice lady you scored an 80 on your test.  An 80 is passing.  (I have no clue if that is a good score or if I almost failed.)  At this point you just want to leave.  She tells you to come back in 20 minutes to get your license.  You seriously comtemplate finding a bar.

Thirteenth, instead of getting a DUI on the way home, play Angry Birds for twenty minutes and then the nice lady calls you and hands you your Korean driver’s license.  Drive home from the DMV, the same way you’d been driving for the last six weeks.

And no, that isn’t an euphemism.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D4W8wVd8S0c&feature=relmfu

Skip to about 3:10 to see Mrs. Stockdale hold a microphone for some famous Korean musician.  This was actually shown on Korean television and millions of people got to see the side of her head.

Congratulations Mrs. Stockdale on your newfound international fame and for being the only caucasian in the audience.