dalestockdale

Archive for December, 2010|Monthly archive page

Merry New Year . . .

In Uncategorized on December 31, 2010 at 11:47 pm

To ring in the new year, the Stockdales watched ‘Barbie in Mermaidia’ last night.  Truly a classic, but not at good as ‘Barbie and the Diamond Castle’ or ‘Barbie and the 12 Dancing Princesses.’

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barbie:_Mermaidia

Then, Mrs. Stockdale fell asleep on the couch at about 9:15 pm.  Not a creature was stirring by 9:45 pm.  When we awoke to the middle little Stockdale at 7:15 am it was 2011.

The ball hasn’t even dropped in America yet.  So, here’s wishing all our friends and family a happy and healthy 2011 from the future!  Tell Dick Clark hello from the Stockdales.

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Dear Al Gore . . .

In Uncategorized on December 30, 2010 at 3:35 am

In your misguided war to save the environment by eliminating plastic bags ( the most useful free item on the face on the planet ), here is the monster you have created.

Run a marathon, get a free tote bag.

Run a 5k to help the reformed prisoners, get a free tote bag.

Buy some bread, get a free tote bag.

Your wife runs a marathon, she gets a free tote bag.

Your wife runs a 5k to help reform some prisoners, she gets a tote bag.

Buy some more bread, get another tote bag.

Use some random company to move to Singapore, get a tote bag.

Send a kid to camp, get a tote bag.

Buy some software, get a tote bag.

Buy some sandals, get a tote bag.

Do an Ironman, get a tote bag.

Buy even more bread, get a tote bag.

This doesn’t even include the 10-20 of these things I’ve thrown away over the years.  Plus, every time I throw one away, I put it inside a regular plastic bag out of spite, just to take up more room in the landfill. 

Remember the road to hell is paved with good intentions, not common sense.  And according to some dead French guy named Voltaire, common sense is not so common.  And according to Groundskeeper Willie, the French are nothing but cheese eating surrender monkeys.  So, it goes without saying that the Simpsons should be consulted on all environmental matters.

Personally, I have more faith in something I see on the Simpsons than 90% of what I’m told is wrong with the Earth.  Letting Mr. Burns build 100-200 nuclear reactors is really what our country needs, not reusable bags and that Prius thing.

Ferris wheel on a ferris wheel . . .

In Uncategorized on December 28, 2010 at 1:07 am

The Singapore Flyer is the largest observation (that’s metric for ferris) wheel in the world.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Singapore_Flyer

It is situated across from the Singapore central business district and provides a great view of downtown, the port, and the island in general.  On a clear day, you can see for kilometers (that’s metric for miles).

Since Mrs. Stockdale’s folks are gung-ho on tourist type stuff, we took the whole Stockdale clan for a ride. 

And of course, since we were in a ferris wheel, we made Mrs. Stockdale do her trick.


(As always, click to embiggen.)

Waves 1 – Mrs. Stockdale 0 . . .

In Uncategorized on December 24, 2010 at 12:20 am

More on the Stockdale family Christmas vacation later, but first the important stuff.

If you think Mrs. Stockdale read this sign . . .

or this sign . . .

then you would be wrong . . .

Just walk around them. . .

In Uncategorized on December 17, 2010 at 2:42 am

In America, if there is construction work on the street, they erect giant cones and barriers all around to prevent the public from getting anywhere close to the horrible danger.  In Singapore, you just walk around the sparks.

If you asked, he’d probably let you do some welding.

A very Stockdale Christmas. . .

In Uncategorized on December 13, 2010 at 12:42 am

Every year, the Stockdales venture out into the forest to cut down a Christmas tree.  This year in Singapore, was no exception. 

As we set out on our long journey, the excitement ran high amongst the little Stockdales.

After much searching, we began to encounter signals that we were closing in on the proper area.

At last, the entrance to the forest.


The choices were many!

It took hours and hours of searching to find a Stockdale worthy tree, but victory was finally ours!

The journey over, we retraced our steps and returned to the Stockdale compound.

As always, decorating the tree was the best part.  It obviously went off without any whining, crying, pushing, shoving, or Stockdale sisterliness.


Merry Christmas from the Stockdales!

A sternly worded letter . . .

In Uncategorized on December 6, 2010 at 1:10 am

Last Friday, the middle little Stockdale lost a tooth.  This was a fairly significant milestone for the Stockdales because this was the first top tooth to fall out for any of them.

I had gone out for some frosty malt beverages with a buddy that evening, so Mrs. Stockdale was left to prepare the Stockdale residence for the arrival of the Tooth Fairy.  It seems the preparation may have gone awry, because the Tooth Fairy, unfamiliar with the local coinage, left the middle little Stockdale a fifty-cent piece, not the normal dollar paid for a lost tooth.

To say the middle little Stockdale was disappointed, disheartened, and had experienced permanent psychological damage would be an understatement.  So how did she respond?  Did she cry?  Did she plot her revenge using tactical nuclear weapons or homemade explosives?  NO!  She went Grandpa Simpson and wrote the Tooth Fairy a sternly worded letter with Mrs. Stockdale’s assistance.

This morning, when the middle little Stockdale awoke from her slumber, the customer service department at the Tooth Fairy had made things right and put an additional fifty cents under her pillow. 

Sternly worded letters, is there nothing they can’t do?